The ick

History

The first documented use of the ick in this meaning was on an episode of Ally McBeal that aired in 1998. The phrase also appeared on the 2003 episode of Sex and the City, "The Ick Factor". It was popularized by Olivia Attwood, a 2017 contestant on Love Island. She said "When you've seen a boy, and got the ick, it doesn't go... it's caught you, and it's taken over your body. It's just ick. I can't shake it off." In 2020, catching the ick became common parlance on TikTok.

Description

The ick commonly occurs in the initial period of attraction, before a relationship has developed the loyalty that allows people to overlook small flaws. The ick can arise after specific triggers, often trivial behaviors; The Guardian gave examples such as not using a pillowcase, walking angrily while wearing flip flops, letting legs dangle while sitting at a barstool, or having crusty red sauce at the corners of the mouth after eating spaghetti. New York calls it "that cringey, unsettling feeling you get in your guts when someone you were previously enamored with becomes wholly repulsive to you".

Icks are defined as trivial matters, rather than wide compatibility gaps like willingness to have children or strong religious views. The Guardian wrote that "the litany of humiliation is more fine-grained than observational comedy. It felt like a new form, one with the attentiveness of poetry to intangible indignities. Hard to explain, impossible to justify, immediately resonant."

Psychologist Becky Spelman told The Independent that the ick might arise when we find "our unconscious mind reacting to some fundamental incompatibilities between us and the person to whom we were so recently attracted... Because of the initial rush of attraction, we've chosen to overlook these fundamental incompatibilities and to pursue a relationship with them. However, when there are serious incompatibilities, problems will emerge at some point."

Some people intentionally induce the ick, imagining their crush doing ick-inducing activities to soften the emotional toll of unrequited love.

References

References

1. Samadder, Rhik. (2022-07-31). "Got the ick? When a sudden pang of disgust ruins your romance". The Observer.
2. Lindsay, Kate. (2023-10-09). "How to Avoid Giving Women 'The Ick'".
3. Rasker, Rachel. (2022-03-24). "Why we get 'the ick', plus how to overcome it".
4. "'The ick' is all over TikTok. It may be ruining your chance at love.".
5. . (2025-06-20). ["Ick Slang Meaning"](https://www.merriam-webster.com/slang/ick). *Merriam-Webster*.
6. (9 August 2023). "What actually is "the ick" and why do we get it?". Cosmopolitan.
7. Singh-Kurtz, Sangeeta. (2020-06-22). "You've Probably Had 'the Ick' Without Knowing It".
8. (2021-08-17). "What is 'the ick' and how does it develop? Experts give us the lowdown".
9. Winks, Kitty. (2023-08-04). "Getting 'the ick' can be surprisingly helpful".
10. Laws, Chloe. (2021-08-20). "Why 'the ick' isn't a superficial phrase used by 'picky women', but is actually a way of protecting ourselves from men who can't handle rejection".